Self-esteem can be seen as the combination of how you perceive yourself and the value you place on the self you see.
You have core self-esteem which is the value you place on yourself at your core, and situational self-esteem which is the value you place on yourself determined by situational factors (work situation at the moment, weight at the moment).
Certain researchers say that core self-esteem is in place by age 4 and is determined by how your caregivers responded to you. No matter what, it is exciting to know that your core self-esteem can be improved. How?
If you suffer from any thoughts of being a victim, expand your awareness so that you are able to decide that victim consciousness or self-blame is simply toxic now. Let it go.
Make a nonjudgmental inventory of your talents and strengths and set goals for accepting them and continuing to improve yourself.
Stop neglecting your own needs to take care of others. Be compassionate and loving, but not disrespecting of yourself.
Do your very best at any given moment (it will vary depending upon what your circumstances are).
Remember that positive self-esteem is not created by “all or none” thinking. Allow yourself to risk-take and realize that even seeming “mistakes” can help you grow!
Let go of the cultural standards of beauty and FEEL your beauty from WITHIN. Offer that as a gift to yourself and everyone around you. People are drawn to others who feel good about themselves.
Learn to speak about yourself with directness and honesty. Express your integrity through the harmony of what you say and do.
Above all, celebrate your risk-taking and your successes!
I’ve had many roles in this life, but one that I enjoyed very much was the teaching of literature which I did for over 10 years. I always appreciated how literature can reflect well crafted slices of life. For example, in this quote from Shakespeare in All’s Well that Ends Well, the line reads: “The web of our own life is of mingled yarn. . . .”
I’ve always loved these words because they give me a visual image that is comforting about our lives. I do see my life as a tapestry—-and this tapestry at times can seem full of loose threads and knotted yarn. I sometimes reflect on how one painful or joyful thing is contributing to the bigger picture.
All of us experience challenges that may at times seem overwhelming, and I think we all wonder at times, how can I possibly overcome the circumstances I am finding myself in?
But we do overcome. And we find along the way that the greatest challenges almost always lead to the greatest growth. Or I like to say, the stumbling blocks on our path can become the stepping stones.
So if we go back to this tapestry we are weaving that we call our lives, we can hope that at the end of our lives, when we turn our life’s work of art over, we will witness a picture that is perfectly what it needed to be.
The knotted yarn, the loose threads–all of it had a purpose,
and in fact, in the end, without the presence of these seeming imperfections, the picture would not be as clear or as perfect as it ends up being.
So, you see from this point of view, we also understand that everything in our lives is happening with some sort of purpose—-all of it—-so that we may grow and learn, and create our world’s meaning.
Now, I am in no way suggesting that life is predestined, but rather that through the choices you make throughout your life, you are discovering not only your world, but also yourself.
I’m so excited about my April 4th, 2019, presentation at Sentara VB General Hospital! I will share Harvard Medical School concepts as well as material from my training and 21 years as a holistic practitioner and life coach to help you create more happiness, peace and resilience!
Lecture and Discussion Includes:
What power does your mind have?
How do you deal with negative thoughts?
Why is it important to let go of what others think?
How does the way you start your day affect your life?
How can you create more happiness in your life?
How does focus on discontentment keep you there?
How do you free yourself of toxic thinking (negative loop tapes in your mind)?
What three important things do people need for a meaningful life?
The seminar includes handouts, food and drink, and opportunity to win a door prize!
Sponsored by Deepak Talreja, MD, Cardiovascular Associates.